Forest Row FC 3 vs 0 Dormansland Rockets

Derby day and there was an air of confidence around Ronald Holah. Armed with his coaching staff of Alan Evans and Northern Tom, he surveyed the carpet at the memorial ground, feeling calm in the build up. Words had been spoken and bets had been exchanged. A certain bank account is now looking a little healthier...

After a suggestion of tactical genius from an unnamed individual, Big Ron went with Michael Gardner up front. It was literally like watching Ross Barkley morph into a white Lukaku. He bullied the two small centre halves and brought others into the game. Stunning stuff.

The atmosphere at the Pavilion was electric. A record crowd of 7 blokes, 2 girls and a baby had turned up in force - and you couldn't hear yourself think. Even the famous Bobby Smith had made an appearance.

We started the game on the up and inside the first few minutes were already on our way. Lukaku checked in on his left and swung a boot. Although the keeper should have done better, the early effort caught him off guard and sailed in. 1-0.

This was a derby day debut for a few players, including our resident magician, Ollie Monnery. He caused havoc and turned the full backs inside out - it was almost assault. After drifting - no, gliding across the pitch, he hit one with that wand of a left foot from 25 yards. Looking to be sailing over, it nestled in the top right hand corner. A sumptuous finish.

Frow dominated the first half, but were lucky not to concede a penalty, after a rush of blood to the excellent Mr Bean. After taking the Rockets' gentleman from behind (not sexually), Smithy then cleanly took the ball. The referee must have been confused by this because he decided to wave away the protests, missing the foul. To be fair, Stevens would have saved it anyway...

Both sides had reason to bemoan the referee. Although clearly a nice bloke, he had about as much control of the game as a substitute teacher does in a French class. Apparently 8 refs had declined this game, so fair play to the man.

The second half was scrappy and Frow didn't assert the same authority. That said, we kept our heads and defended strongly. We were always dangerous on the counter and eventually it showed, with Dawes finding a burst of energy from somewhere and finding George with a lofted pass. George chested and volleyed, bottom left. Rumours of a miss-kick or shinner were vehemently denied by the Diego-like bastard.

Celebrations were wild and well deserved. The game had everything and even Stevens had something to do in the end. A top penalty save and collecting the follow up was the cherry on the cake. George said he blocked it, but the stadium cried Kieran.

Up the f***ing Frow!